Timothy Simpson refuses to be the everyday, standard-issue clown.

In fact, he prides himself on being more of a classic cut-up in the category of Red Skelton and Bob Hope.

This Mormon funnyman -- who makes a decent living in Tinseltown telling squeaky-clean jokes -- labels himself as a multitalented comic holding true to righteous principles while others call him a comedy savant.

"Am not! Am too! Well ... I don't want to brag, but what's a genius to do?" he says. "Savants are savvy sillymen who are often considered too sophisticated and intellectual for the masses ... perhaps this is due to our cerebralliotic pretentions and exhausting inventive vocabulariastics?"

"I don't frequent the typical humor subjects or obvious jokes," he said. "I try to be brilliant. Victor Borge was brilliant. Ricky Gervais is my current funny favorite. My all-time favorite was actually Fred Allen. I don't worry about being understood or rocking the house. I don't want whooooooeeee! I want laughs that will leave them chuckling for a lifetime."



Dana Daniels, a fellow comedian working in California, said: "Tim Simpson is one of the funniest guys I know. You can talk about anything in the world and Tim will have a funny comeback for it. He is the quickest-witted person I have ever met. Whenever I have a problem with a joke for my act or need help with a bit, the first person I call is Tim because he is able to rattle off 10 alternate punch lines right there over the phone."

"I credit the church and the Word of Wisdom for much of my 'smart' humor," Simpson said. "I love that I don't have to cheat and perform easy titillating jokes that a sophomoric chimp could do. And it's a heartier laugh when someone recognizes the skill of a well-crafted joke. The standards we are taught are a great reminder and guide for good effective clean living and good effective clean fun."

"Sadly, today's demographic majority has devolved. I get so sad when I hear sophomoric material passed on as genius or edgy. Why do we give all our ethical and artistic integrity up for judgment to the MTV generation? We used to pay top dollar for the best. Now it seems like we make millionaires out of loud-mouth, classless obnoxious loons?"

The California comic, now 45, attended Ringling Bros. Barnum & Bailey Clown College in 1979, after which he traveled with the circus.

As he tells it, "During my clown graduation, we were nervous that we wouldn't trip. The highlight of the ceremony was the "I have a cream pie" speech by our keynote speaker, Talcum X. And I'll never forget the dean clown's closing remarks, 'Congrats ... see you all in the car.'"

"Since the circus played such huge venues, we rarely spoke because we wouldn't be heard by most of the crowd," he said. "So I left and became a street performer. Then Magic Mountain. Then Disneyland. Next I was headlining on cruise ships."

Simpson soon became frustrated as he continued to create what he believed were funnier routines than those supplied by the club owners and cruise directors.
So he started drawing art cartoons and writing for others. (Today the art pieces are numbered in the thousands, listed under a company called "Boobiehatch Ink.")

"I also started filming my own public-access-cable show "Smile, Nod, & Then Slowly Back Away," Simpson said. "This was my pre-YouTube era. I filmed about 40-60 episodes."

Then TV host Michael Burger noticed his work and CBS hired Simpson to write jokes for his show.

"I incurred a reputation for being wild and zany but most of all, squeaky clean," Simpson said.

He is currently working on launching his Web site, selling his art and two theater projects.

"Living in Hollywood allows me plenty of work, lots of casuals, movie premieres, theaters, conventions, etc. These are not necessarily career makers, but they easily help pay the bills," he said.

In the Hollywood California Ward, he's been declared the congregational clown.

"I also prepare and choreograph sacrament. People, don't forget to tip your deacons!"

He once assumed that when Hollywood saw his wares he'd be a hot property and always be working. He's found it takes a little more than that.

He has some advice to any Mormon headed to Hollywood: "Prepare your product. Have a Web site, photos and, if at all possible, a good agent, a good manager, a good producer. Have a team!"

"The truth is I never wanted to use the church as a promotional tool. I never bore a movie pitch or mentioned where I was appearing in sacrament. I love using my talents to make a lesson more riveting and/or add to all or any ward activity I'm suited for. For example, a few years back I created a jug band called the "Priestie Boys." It was between that and "Choose the Righteous Brothers." Although it was very well-received, our CD went straight to coaster."

E-mail: haddoc@desnews.com